Execution, Acquisition, and Consummation of an 8 oz. bottle of Dear Park water

*The following chain of events or 'slice of life' occurred on June 14, 2004 between the hours of 1:00 p.m. - 2:00 p.m. eastern standard time in Sandbridge, Virginia.*
Sweating... Always sweating... I hate when perspiration beads into my eyes. I hold my hand up to the sun, my lips parched, the excess heat rising off the sand in the distance. Surveying my surroundings, I spot my flat to the left. Its pale grey siding with sky blue shudders flapping in the wind; this colossus rises 3 ½ stories above the dunes which are littered with a few long strands of crab grass and randomly…