A satire written about family reunions.

There were very few things that brought whole families together. The only real occasions were weddings and funerals. Then, some brillian mind, unsatisfied with this arrangement, invented the family reunion. The family reunion brings your entire family together for no reason. At family reunions, you will reminisce, you will laugh, you will cry, you will discover your family tree has more branches than you ever thought possible while Grandpa fishes his dentures out of the punch bowl.
In order to fully understand the horror of the family reunion, you must first understand the mechanics o…